Today was the first day of kriya for the kids. It was marvelously well. They were very responsive for it and sooo cooperative.

I've been trying to escape my mind lately. I don't think I do it consciously, but I notice that I've been spending A LOT of time at the bookstore so absorbed in this one teen novel (Twilight). I'm doing a lot of wrestling with my mind and wondering whether this is always the case or whether I'm just noticing it because I can't seem to form a cohesive thought long enough to write about it.

I checked out The Rock Oasis today. The staff had some attitude, but the climbing was good. The bouldering was better than the Climbing Academy, but the people were nicer there.

Today I noticed how rapidly my moods seem to change from being really grateful to being really doubtful. I absolutely love what I am doing right now and the reason why I am here, but I wake up every morning wondering if I'm capable of it. I can't seem to ever feel completely comfortable with getting up in front of 30 high school kids. I feel like I have to keep proving myself to everyone, especially myself.

I realized today how much I miss social interaction. I miss having friends I can call to make lunch plans with and stuff. Not that I can afford it now anyways, but just having the option of being able to call people and meet up with them. I never understood how the hell people are able to make friends with people in a new city.

Western Technical Commercial School

Today we started the YES program in another school! The students are very cooperative and so different from the last class the I was here to teach. I'm co-teaching with Vaishnavi and Larissa who are both from Toronto.

Last night at 3am I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep. I found myself pondering on past relationships and realizing how much they've sculpted me into who I am today. I never realized how depressed I was during some of those past relationships. I hope I've come to a point in my life where I am more aware of my emotions and able to act accordingly.

Toronto!!

A church across the street from Bathurst subway exit.

A man who insisted I take his picture swearing he is photogenic. what do you think?

Isn't the city gorgeous?

I miss this guy sooo sooo much!

Welcome to Canada!

Where the fire hydrants are skinny and yellow!

Awesome building, eh?

The alley to where I'm staying.

Beautiful Toronto!

my first winter day in toronto!

Due to popular request, I've decided to attempt to regularly post on my blogspot. Wish me luck!!

Here's the situation: I am back in Toronto for the third time to teach YES (Youth Empowerment Seminar) in a high school (Western Technical Institute). It is such a privilege to be back here doing this! The class starts next Monday. Larissa and I met the teacher today. She seemed very supportive of the program and is looking forward to starting Monday.

Afterwards, I went back home and took a nap due to my lack of a good amount of sleep (I only got 2 hours yesterday and had to wake up at 5:30 today) than I decided to go on a little adventure!! To go find a rockclimbing gym, which really isn't too hard since the bitter cold makes climbers run indoors. Ha! That rhymes!! Anyways, there's about three downtown that I have access to through subways and buses.

Today I checked out Toronto Climbing Academy. It was practically empty because it was midday and most people are usually at their day jobs then. I didn't realize how happy climbing made me until I was so grateful that I had found the place.

Two more climbing gyms to check out!

Are you happy?

How could I not be happy? Everything I've ever wanted has been handed to me on a silver platter, with dessert to follow. I have the greatest knowledge at the tip of my fingertips. Every morning I wake up and live a life I never dreamed I would be living. I have more confidence then I could have ever dreamed of having. I've been given the time and opportunity to overcome my doubts and come into being myself. Everyday, I am soo grateful.

I get this great once in a lifetime opportunity to spread this knowledge to people: to help others become happy! I am changing the world. My lifetime compared to the existence of the earth is so little, not even noticeable, but I am spending it changing the world. How is that possible? How could I have been given such a wonderful opportunity?

New Jersey

Sitting here on Ryan’s uncle’s porch with Michael Buble drumming in my ears, it’s hard to believe that it’s only been a month since the Teacher Training Course(TTC) ended in Toronto where we learned to teach the Youth Empowerment Seminar (YES!), but it has. In only a month, I’ve gone through so many transformations and revelations. I am a completely different person then I was before I started. So much stronger with a lot more faith then I could have ever wished for, but I am still as confused if not more confused then I was before I started this lifestyle.

It is a lifestyle. Some people find it difficult to trust people while we’re in the position where we have to trust them completely. A lot of them are strangers to start, but we all end up feeling like family in the end. Never having really been in a position to be taken care of like this by non-family members, it is weird to be in such a position where I have to be so dependent.

It makes me long for my home, Reno. It's only been like a month and a half since I’ve been in Reno, but it feels like a completely different life. It’s so weird. I miss climbing, but it's becoming a dull longing that I don't see getting fulfilled anytime soon. My schedule isn't my own here. If I’m not having a good day and I just want to sit in a coffee shop all day and read a book, I can't. I have to match my schedule to others and lack my own transportation to have access to the city. It’s a weird feeling. I’ve barely had any alone time, except in meditation.